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Positive Within Negativity

Life is what we make it: we can make it a pleasure and more tolerable or we can make it miserable by the way we respond to it.

I believe I have learned a lot about responding to life’s challenges in a more appropriate manner than I used to ten years ago, and because I have, I live a much happier life.

I assume that you want the same things I do, that you want peace, joy, and happiness to permeate our lives in a positive way when we interact with those whom we associate and have dealings.

This blog is a way for me to share with you the lessons I’ve learned about “What Matters Most In Life”. I want to do this so you won’t become overwhelmed when misfortune hits you and give up on things ever getting better for you.

We cannot give up because nothing will change that’s good if we do. We can’t go backwards or stay in status quo, nothing good is there for us either! All we can do is accept the challenge and move forward, trying to change our perspective and the way we respond to life and it’s challenges.

If we cave in to the negatives of life and focus on what we don’t have, we miss the blessings and the joy that life also provides but we’ve become too jaded to notice. Doing this will NOT make our lives any more tolerable, just more miserable.

Look at your life and then turn around the negatives you see into a positive. It may take a lot of effort to find the blessings at first but before long, you will see them easier and more frequently.

Let me give you a few examples of what I mean.

Story #1: We had just received a huge income tax refund, which is NOT a usual for us. We actually had almost $5,000 in our tax refund check. We had the check for a short time before we had an emergency.

Our toilet had overflowed. Even though the water was clear, it was still considered black water and was contaminated. I didn’t know that at the time and so I was soaking up the water with towels and washing them. However, washing them added to the flooding…which I had not realized either.

Finally, a friend suggested we call a particular plumber to come out and see what was wrong. He discovered we had a pipe on our side of the road that had broken and the whole front yard had to be plowed up. It cost us a total of $4,000 after our cost of all the cleanup and plumbing work was done. We had to have new carpeting throughout the whole house except the living room because of the black water.

My husband was several states away for his father’s funeral and taking care of his dad’s affairs. I had an illness that prevented me from bending over to clean up or to pack up the house. The insurance covered the cleanup and carpeting but we had a $500 deductible. They also allowed ServPro to clean up and pack up rooms in the house. I had to make the decisions by myself because my husband couldn’t focus from all he was dealing with on his father’s affairs.

At first I was very angry because most of our refund check had gone to this emergency, and so little was left for us to do what we wanted to do with it. It took me about another day to ask myself, “What would we have done if we didn’t have that money? What if the problem had happened a few months earlier or a few months later, when the money had already been spent?” That’s when I realized the blessing in having the check when we did, and so I no longer saw the situation as a negativity.

Story #2: We wanted to see more of our grandchildren because most of them lived so far away from us that we rarely were able to see them. I had prayed and asked God if that desire would ever be realized. He assured me that it would.

Not long after the prayer, my husband was told that he and the company he worked for as a contract manager was being replaced. It was a very hard time for him, and that, in turn, made life hard on me too.

My husband had put in applications everywhere in Oregon (where we lived), he had even put in applications in Utah, Texas, and Indiana. Nothing was happening, so we decided to move to Indiana and stay with our son and his family until we secured a job. With so many states surrounding there, we thought that would give him a better chance of finding a job.

We left Oregon on July 4th 2000 and arrived in Indiana July 6th, on a Saturday. Sunday we went to church with our son and family. On Monday, my husband picked up the local sales paper and saw a management job right there in town near where we were. Tuesday, he called on the job and Wednesday they called him back and did a phone interview. On Thursday, he was offered the job.

My husband losing his job put us in Indiana near our son and his precious family. This was the beginning of my prayer being answered. Three years later, my son living in Texas called to tell my husband that his company was going to be calling him for a job interview in Texas. As it turned out, he did get the job and we moved to Texas.

Living in Texas put us only two and half hours from our son and his family and only thirteen hours from our son in Indiana. That still put us twenty-two hours from our son and his family in Utah and thirty-four hours from our daughter and her family in Oregon if we drove.

From then on, most of our spare money goes to plane tickets to Utah and Oregon to see family we are too far away from to drive. We are able to see them a lot more frequently than we had before moving to Texas. Do you see the blessing? The lost job and moving to Indiana actually brought to pass our desire to see family more often.

Story #3: Before we moved to Texas, my husband moved there ahead of me to set up everything for us to move there. I was working at the time, so I had to finish up my job. A month later, he came home to help me tie up loose ends and then planned on taking one of the cars back with him so he would had a vehicle to drive.

On Sunday, the day before he was to leave and go back to Texas, we went to a church conference about twenty-five miles away from home. On the way home after church, the car died right there in our town and about five miles from home. All we had to do was call our son to come rescue us. It couldn’t have been any more convenient.

The next day we had our vehicle towed to a repair shop. We were told the engine was dead and that it would take $2,500 to fix it. We only had $5,000 from the company to make our move with, which included the moving van. There was no money to fix the car and still have enough to move with so we had to get the other vehicle ready for the drive and tow the broken car behind the moving van.

Where was the blessing in this story? Do you see it? If we had not driven to church and put on those extra miles, the vehicle would have broken down somewhere late at night in the boonies and my husband would have been stranded. He would be stuck and no money to fix it. Instantly, he recognized the blessing and was thankful for it.

These are just three of the many stories I can tell you of situations where a calamity turned into a blessing. It was not always recognized as a blessing at first, but we did finally recognized it and felt grateful. Instead of feeling like life treated us badly and was always taking things from us, we saw the blessing and as a result, negatives were turned into a positive.

You can see blessings as well when you look for them and accept them with gratitude. As my stories reveal, you can turn a bad situation into a positive one when you accept life on it’s own terms and look for God’s hand in the situation.

The same is true when you see a negative situation that makes you angry, especially when someone does something that angers you, and then you do what I call, “Turn the penny over to see what’s on the other side.” In other words, you look at a situation and assume that it may not be what appears to be.

Turning the penny over means you consider what another scenario might be that would make it a different outcome that you had not considered before. Perhaps someone had a different motive than you immediately thought of or there were situations that you are not aware of that changes the situation dramatically from what it first appeared to be. In other words, turn over the penny and see what the other side presents.

Sometimes you just have to accept that “It is what it is!” and let go of it. If you can’t do anything about it or it won’t help the situation to create a commotion about it, then leave it alone. It won’t change things or make things any better, except to appease ego and emotions. It does nothing that creates peace or peace of mind in the situation, or do what’s best for the situation when the desired outcome is peace or peace of mind.

I hope my comments have given you something to think about, and that what I’ve said will help you see your trials differently.

I know God makes it clear in the scriptures that He is not pleased with people who don’t recognize His hand in their lives and then give the “enemy to peace” credit for the misfortune they experience instead of seeing the blessing that comes from Him. That’s not smart, and it’s no way to earn the Lord’s trust in our ability to accept His blessings in the future.

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Protect What Matters

Protecting What Matters Is Necessary Now More Than Ever!

If “what matters” is for you to function in a free society, and if “what matters” is to protect your family, friends, and relationships from the fallout that is in a future without freedom, safety, and security, and if “what matters” is having peace of mind, then you need to accept some things you would rather not know or be bothered with and confront what you would rather not face.

You may want to investigate this concept a little bit more. We need to become proactive in what Congress is doing to protect our businesses and our way of life. If we don’t, we will lose what we have enjoyed throughout the years. Don’t take the last statement as a political point of view because it is not. What I said is a reality we are facing today, I’m talking about right now. We need to recognize this is true and do what we can to resolve this situation.

First, we must take a closer look at ourselves and what we demand from those who represent us. Are we expecting them to pass legislation they shouldn’t because we are self-centered and demanding or are they passing legislation they shouldn’t because of pressure from other politicians?

Second, we must consider what you can do to counter-act the mistakes policy makers are committing and then take appropriate actions in protecting our families. That’s why I have posted links for heirloom seeds and portable greenhouses for you to check out. Use this link  WhatMattersStore.com.

I have been paying close attention to what’s been going on in Washington the past ten years or so. Believe me, I know things you would rather not know. I hope you will heed my warning and spend money on things you really need right now: such food storage, non-hybrid seeds, portable greenhouses, and emergency supplies.

If you don’t believe me,  just let things happen that puts your family in jeopardy. It’s okay if you won’t trust my judgment, but at least spend a little money now and put a few items aside in case I am right.

Perhaps some day you will say what my son said when I asked him to put on a long sleeve shirt and long pants before riding the motorcycle to work. I said, “Just do it. One day you may thank me.” Later that day, I came home a found a note on a chair that said: “Don’t worry, I’m okay. Robin’s mom took me to the hospital. I’m glad I listened to you.”

He had been in a head-on collision; the motorcycle met a huge Ford Thunderbird around a blind curve on a narrow mountain road.  I had said it many times before, that he needed to put on long clothes, probably too many times and became a squeaky wheel, but I am glad he finally listened to me. It saved him from being hurt worse. He only had a broken toe and a concussion cut on his knee. I hope you might listen to me as well, and save you and your family from getting hurt too badly in the future.

I realize that it is usually easier to live in default and allow things to come at you and then react. You probably throw up your hands and say “I can’t do anything about it anyway.” However, understanding that you are only one person and that what you think, say or do won’t change anything, I ask you to do something proactive to take control of your life–even if it’s uncomfortable. Being in the driver’s seat in order to have “what matters” to you will effort on your part, and often means swimming up stream and against the current.

You’ve probably figured out by now that, with twenty-four domain names and more than that in blogs, I am very committed to helping people who feel as I do or who suffer from the type of depression I spoke of earlier.

It gets harder every day to handle the news we hear on television (at least the little truths they allow us to hear) or read some of the propaganda they put in newspapers and magazines today. It is even harder to sift through the abundance of information available to us on the Internet without learning more than we want to know.

It is no wonder that people are feeling a bit overwhelmed by all the chaos that comes with living in our times, and no wonder they feel helpless in protecting “what matters” to them. I am here to help you with this. However, in some cases, I will add to your stress level by reporting on things you need to know but would rather not know right now.

I realize that this is a strange statement to make because it is not what you expect to hear from me. However, YOU MUST know the truth about what is going on every single day that threatens “what matters” to you and to me. You may know some things but there is much more that you may not know but need to know.

I will try to tell you what you need to know without stressing you out or causing you to become overwhelmed. Keep in mind that if you resist the truth and not face what you should, it will only become harder for you to protect “what matters” and find peace of mind.

Remember that FREEDOM is not free because someone has to pay the price for it. The more of us who share the load and pay the price, the easier it will be to protect that which the enemy among us in sheep’s clothing is trying to steal from us. They will succeed in their mission if we continue to live in default and not engage ourselves.

We cannot depend on mainstream media to report honest and unbiased news anymore, which to me, is unacceptable. For a candid look at events that are not being reported by NBC, ABC, or CBS, and sometimes CNN, then perhaps you will check on my blog at CanWeBelieveIt.Info.

If “what matters” is for you to function in a free society; if “what matters” is toprotect your family, friendships, and relationships from the fallout of a future without freedom, safety, and security; and if “what matters” is peace of mind, then you need to consider my comments in this posting and ask yourselves if you are prepared to pay the price for what is required of you to make that happen.

When you identify the things that really matter to you, and make choices that protect those things the best you can, then everything else doesn’t matter does it?

 

Feeling Overwhelmed by Our Times

The Problem We Share

People are becoming overwhelmed by the times we live in and are having to rethink “what matters” to them. As a result, they are beginning to shut down emotionally and refuse to listen to negative reporting.

This is understandable, there is only so much bad we can take before it affects us at home and work, possibly socially as well. However, this condition only makes things worse and does nothing to provide peace of mind, to trust government to solve the problems we face, and to gain a sense of security.

We share these feelings and let me tell you why. I went through my own rethinking process about “what matters” after September 11, 2001; the day we were attacked by Islamic terrorists. Within a weeks, I had succumbed to excessive thinking, and became depressed enough that I could not function normally.

I could not find enjoyment in doing things that used to give me pleasure and my emotions shut down. Depression affected my life so severely that I could not function at work well enough to do simple tasks, and so I lost my job.

I am telling you these things because you probably know these feelings. You may be worrying about your job, about where the money will come from to protect what you have, and you may not see any clear solution or know how to respond to our times.

Truly, you are not alone in these feelings. Even though I am not suffering from the same worries as you, I do know some of what you must be feeling. You may need to do what I did and seek counsel from your church, family, friends, and those who have been through the same concerns.

This is where I can assist you. I made it through the bad times but writing in my journal. I was able to redirect my negativity into something positive. I even wrote my first poetry during those times.

Seeing the American people reach out to comfort those suffering was uplifting to me. This is what I wrote in my journal and became part of the book I wrote about that September event. Let these words warm your souls and assure you that we are not alone in these times.

THANKS TO THE AMERICAN PEOPLE

You were an inspiration to this country, as you came together from far and wide across this nation; united in purpose and patriotism.

This was shown in the flags you raised and the songs you sang, in the candles you lit, and the prayers you said.

With heads held high and caring arms spread, you hugged each other as tears were shed.

You were a ray of sunshine in the middle of turmoil, and an inspiration when this country was thrust into chaos.

No one did this alone; we did it together! Together we bridged the chasm of grief and despair, and together we face the future.

Although outraged for what happened that day, we must be united in order to be strong.

I’ve written about my experiences in a book, “The Treasure Box Series, Volume I: Peace, Joy, and Happiness.” The book tells more about the lessons I learned during that time, and the changes I had to make to stop reacting and respond appropriately to stressful and challenging situations. The book is loaded with suggestions for staying out of the wake that follows something traumatic and how to avoid getting caught up in things that don’t matter.

My biggest problem was excessive thinking of gloom and doom, caused by my fear that we would be attacked again and that my family would be harmed. Adding to depression was my bubble of trust in government burst when I realized government cannot completely protect us from an enemy committed to doing America and its citizens mortal harm.

My next challenge was the internet and emails. With all the information available about our times, I learned of deceitful manipulators in past and present government who want to destroy the American way of life as we know it.

Also, I learned from the internet and emails that some of our trusted officials have abused those they represent by making deals and passing bills (stuffed with pork to satisfy special interest groups) that people would object to if they knew about it.

And then, adding insult to injury, I learned that some of those I thought I could trust had actually abused their power of influence by falsely representing themselves or a policy they want us to support because it benefits them and their agenda and not the American people.

All of these conditions caused me to react and sink into a deeper depression. Does any of this sound familiar to you? Up to that point, I thought that government only had good intentions for America. Learning that was NOT true in most cases was a rude awakening for me, which I did not handle well.

I will not go into any more detail about that time in my life because I’ve written about it in my book, “The Treasure Box Series, Volume I: Peace, Joy, and Happiness.” The book tells you more about the lessons I learned during that time, and the changes I had to make to stop reacting and respond appropriately to stressful and challenging situations. It is loaded with suggestions for staying out of the wake that comes after something traumatic happens and how to not get caught up in things that don’t matter.

It serves you well enough to say that I really do understand things better now, and that I know how you may feel about living in these stressful times. It’s been almost ten years since I first realized I was depressed and learned to process my feeling better about events going on around me. So, yes, I really do have a good understanding of how you probably think, feel, and react to the times we live in today.

All you really need to know about me is that I learned to stop “reacting in default” when I didn’t know any better, and became proactive in my choices.

I learned to consider the worse case scenario for things that concerned me or caused me to be fearful, and then think of possible responses to help me deal with it. Doing that put me in the driver’s seat instead of living in default and fear.

In other words, I no longer react to situations but respond much better to life’s challenges, now that I know how. I learned my lessons well, and as such, I live a much happier and more peaceful life. You can live this way as well.

Welcome To What Matters!

We live in perilous and challenging times. We can give up and succumb to the pressure of our times or we can find a positive way to handle the events taking place around us.

Advice in this blog is from Judith Sherman, author of “The Treasure Box Series, Volume I: Peace, Joy, and Happiness”.

Choices that we make right now affects how we view our situation and if we react or respond appropriately to it.

Our attitude about life events affects the habits we develop and what we get back from life.

A healthy attitude makes a huge difference in our ability to make wise decisions, affecting how proactive we are making our own decisions, and affecting how we engage in life.

Attitude affects whether we live in default or sit in the driver’s seat of life. Sitting in the driver’s seat means we are making our own decisions instead of waiting for something to happen and then let it drag us down.

Living in default means that, instead of realizing life sometimes hands out doses of misfortune to everyone and we are no different or think we are singled out for some reason, we just throw up our hands and give up!

The truth is attitude affects how we accept the lessons we are supposed to learn from a situation and if we see a blessing or not in that experience .

When something bad happens to us, a bad attitude sends us to the same place we always go to when we don’t like what life dishes out to us: being angry with God, our parents, our employers or anyone we think has it better than us.

This blog is here to help you understand the world we live in can be a blessing when we know how to respond appropriately instead of reacting in default.

It’s a matter of being proactive in our choices, engaging in events that require our attention, and sitting in life’s driver’s seat instead of letting things come at us and then react out of emotions, ego, or in default because we know of no other way to respond.

Let us work closely together so we can support each other and be affective in our efforts to protect what matters to us.

If “what matters” is for you to function in a free society, and if “what matters” is to protect your family, friends, and relationships from the fallout that is in a future without freedom, safety, and security, and if “what matters” is having peace of mind, then you need to accept some things you would rather not know or be bothered with and confront what you would rather not face.</blockquote>